When You Stop Caring

If you can categorize people watching as a hobby, well then, it is my favorite one. Of course, the best place to do this is an airport. Since I have spent a significant amount of time in airports lately I’ve been taking part in my favorite hobby quite often.

Before going on let me say that despite the title, this isn’t a post about depression or homesickness. It is more a post about tolerance.

I’ve mentioned my recognition of change. I’m really beginning to notice how this whole experience is changing me as a person. I view them as positive changes for sure. I also feel very blessed to have this chance to step back from my life and analyze things at a deeper level.

I was grabbing a bite to eat at the airport and had been seated at the edge of the makeshift dining room that was shoved in between the security check point and one of those little newspaper shops. Anyone who’s been in an airport knows this is prime location for people watching.

During my people-watching meal, I noticed a woman (talking on her cell phone) and pushing a baby stroller. She was, of course, struggling to make it go straight with one hand. She just happened to cut in front of a younger girl (also on a cell phone).

Well, the girl stepped back and gave a rude, insulted look and glared at the woman as she quickly cut back around her.

First let me say that, personally, I just wish people would get off their stupid cells all together and take care of the tasks at hand. People grossly overestimate their ability to multi-task. Anyway, while watching this incident I realized something.

The pissed off younger girl on her cell phone was me on many occasions not so long ago.

I have changed so much from this old me and living in a new culture caused this. I can’t pinpoint exactly why, but I care so much less about these kinds of inconveniences. I’ve grown more tolerant, I think.

Don’t get me wrong. If you catch me on a bad day the pissed off girl will come out. She’s still in there somewhere. I am by no means perfect in this area.

I’m not sure if it is because I have been forced to be patient and have just adopted this behavior or it is because of something I have not yet identified.

I am just recognizing that in the US we waste so much energy being pissed off at other people. We honk, we complain about things we can’t control, we yell out our car window - all because someone did some little thing that inconvenienced us for 20 seconds.

Then we end up wasting hours of our time and an unnecessary rise in blood pressure obsessing over things that don’t matter at all. All that wasted energy when we could have just let it go and moved on.

I know this isn’t only the US. It affects other cultures, even Brazilians, I’m sure. I’m just noticing it about my own culture. We are only human. We are going to get annoyed. It is natural, but many people spend their entire adult life annoyed.

There is a negative side to this new not-caring me. Often you can become the one that is in the way, inconveniencing others. I don’t want to be that person either. I guess the next step is finding a balance between the two.