Ever wonder how many people you can fit in an elevator? Come to Brazil to find out. I’ve never been crammed in with so many people. I’ve routinely been in a crowded elevator when the door opens at the next floor and think, there is no way one more person could fit in here. This thought goes through my head just as the person squeezes in.
We all have our own personal bubble. Some have a small one and don’t mind close contact with strangers in public. Others have a large one and really want people to keep their space, especially those whom they consider strangers. This varies from culture to culture, of course, and from person to person. In dealing with people I know, even acquaintances, my bubble is relatively small. However, in public situations, I need my space!
Unfortunately for me Brazilians have virtually no bubble at all. First let me say that the cheek kiss/hug greeting really doesn’t bother me, even with people I’ve just met. It does get quite annoying when you have to do it to every person who walks in, though. We recently went to a birthday party and many people arrived fashionably late. Every time someone walked in we had to stand up and greet them. It got a little ridiculous after a while. After you have been someplace for an hour and are into conversations, I kind of like the simple ‘hello’, myself. That is just my opinion though.
Okay, back to the point. What does bother me is people standing so close to me in line at the supermarket that I can feel them breathing on my neck and leaning on my backpack. Strangers walk up to you and start asking you question after question getting uncomfortably close to your face. There is no ‘excuse me’ before starting in on their questions. I find this hard to handle.
I guess it goes without saying that I just don’t think this is something I’ll get used to in two years. I just really want my bubble back!
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2 comments:
He, he ,he. That's a cultural shock I lived here with English people. In fact, we are not educated to say "please", "excuse me" or "sorry". I don't know if it'a bad think or just a different think. English people don't like the three little kisses on face and they have a security distance to talk with strangers (like 1,2m). Before to realise this, I thought they discriminate me or there was something wrong about my deodorant... I think this misunderstanding arrives when we are not able to dialogue and talk about with people.
Here in Montreal, I knew a Tunisien who works in the same industry as me. I used to see him at the bus, and sometimes at the marketplace and we just used to say "Hi". Once, I asked him about the job we worked together, his name, and we became more and more closer when the subject become more personal, like "how we feel as immigrant, or about our families, etc" At the end we was walking on the street, hand in hand, like two real muslims. It was funny because he was not gay and Quebecors don't do this if they are not in the Gay Village ghetto.
It seems like a strange cultural mix that may cause intolerance against minorities, often in new cosmopolitan cities.
I hope you try to enjoy the differences more than feel so shocked. You know some new bacteries are good to develop your natural resistence. Don't be so scared in your buble.
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